This is a pretty freaky flash website, but it's damned cool. You could happily lose yourself for, oooh, at least 2 minutes.

You navigate about with a human hand taking on tasks for bizarre looking creatures; they're like a cross between some of the weird hybrid characters from the Yellow Submarine and a Ren & Stimpy cartoon at its most trippy and outlandish - all dazzlingly-coloured, malformed beasts, like a half-awoken brain that's spewed forth its misshapen, half-baked, lurid imaginings that look like they could do with another 30 minutes on Gas Mark 9.

A word of warning, do not attempt to navigate your way around the page if you are under the influence of psychedelics as you may very well lose not just yourself, but also your mind - You'll be cast adrift in the website forever trying to navigate yourself away, but failing, eventually resigning yourself to your destiny like some doomed tragic figure from Greek mythology, finally accepting your punishing fate where you'll no doubt spend eternity.

You know for a while cooking, for me, got a bit mudane, a but samey, I'd used the finest ingredients from around the globe and beyond - space dust from the impact craters on Mars, flown in by NASA - scrumptious. I've had the elusive Yeti ass-truffle from the foothills of the Himalayas - delectable; ayahuasca from the Peruvian jungle, that was an interesting night, and of course the infamous yet elusive vaginal moss, only found in the outermost boglands of Scatland. Yeah you could say they were well sourced, but getting everything you want sometimes gets boring, then I discovered this recipe book.

It's revolutionised my life, my wife now licks her plate, and my balls, clean and recipes like Jerk-Off Chicken and Man-Jamburger go down as easy as a well kept mistress at every dinner party I host, and my Raviolo Of Jiz and Lobster with Spicy Creamed Cabbage With A Warm Potato & Semen Puree is a sensation!! After reading this book, my wife now often asks me to fill her meat taco with semen, she loves it!

If you don't want to believe me then just check out the comments from these satisfied and grateful cooks, who've been delighting their friends with this nectar of the gods. It's just touching...yourself. If you thought whisking cream tired your arm out, then just try whisking up some of this cream!